family, woodworking, photography, K-pop
Blarg, ugh, etc…
As you’ve probably noticed, I love food. However, I live a pretty sedentary life so my weight has gradually crept up over the last ten years–lame.
I’ve made various efforts to lost weight (some more successful that others) but recently I’ve really rededicated myself to living a more healthy life. I want to be in stronger and in better shape and, vainly, I would like to look better in (and out) of clothes.
I signed up for a women’s weight training class at my local rec center (and roped my my friend Linnie who happens to be an amazing artist into taking it with me) and it has really helped motivate me. It meets for an hour on Tuesdays and Thursdays and it KICKS MY BUTT. Every week we focus on a variation on a weight-lifting workout.
Last week we cross-trained and ran a lap around the track, then lifted weights for a minute, then ran and lifted again, repeated for an hour. We ran a mile and a half which is the most I’ve run since the mile “fun run” I did in sixth grade. (Super lame, but true.) By the end of class I felt like throwing up and I was so sore the next day. But then when we did the same workout two days later it felt just a smidge easier. So that’s progress, right?
On Mondays and Wednesdays when there’s no class I work out on the elliptical for 45 minutes and watch Netflix streaming on my iPad (so far I’ve watched a few different Korean dramas but right now I’m working my way through season 2 of Doctor Who…mmmm…David Tennant–yum.)
Foodwise, I’ve been tracking what I eat and have been staying in the 1500-1600 range for net calories (i.e. I eat have an extra snack on class days).
So I’ve been doing this for a little over a month.
“This is great, Faith!” you might say. “How much weight have you lost?”
ABSOLUTELY none!
We weighted ourselves and had our body fat measured when class started and we just did it again. I weigh the same AND somehow my body fat % has gone up and my lean muscle mass has gone down (Gah!!!!!!!!)
Needless to say, it was pretty discouraging. I’m working out more than I ever have before and somehow loss muscle mass? If I was a guy I would have lost 10 pounds by now. Bleh. My instructor told me to keep a detailed food diary and that we’d figure it out.
On the plus side, I’ve learned that I actually like exercising and that I don’t mind running as much as I thought I did. I don’t even mind perpetually being a bit sore because it reminds me that I’m getting stronger.
This is what my bathroom looks like right now:
What you can’t get from the photo is the sound, a loud, low grumblely growl of a roar of 3 industrial fans plus a dehumidifier going full blast confined in a small room. We turned them off to sleep but I still tossed and turned most of the night, mostly from anxiety.
I get stressed out enough when my home is torn up due to my own choices (i.e. my kitchen update) but when something out of my control happens and I have groups of strangers tramping through my house and our routine is thrown off completely I just get depressed.
I’ve been feeling a little run down lately. It’s nothing major, I just have the feeling that, try as I might, I can’t quite fit my arms around everything.
One of the things that’s been bothering me is that E is going through a rough patch and I’m not sure how to best help him and so I feel rather helpless as a result. For the past few weeks he’s been quite anxious about things in general. Last night he and I were going to walk down the street to drop something off at a neighbor’s house and halfway there he started sobbing and clinging to my leg concerned that our house “was far away.” I tried to explain that he could still see our house and that it wasn’t going anywhere but he was in a panic so I took him home.
From what I could tell from talking with him afterward part of it is a residual effect of our trip to Disneyland. When he asks to go back to Disneyland (everyday) we talk about how Disneyland is far away and so we can’t go there right now and so I guess he thought our house was going to disappear or something? I don’t know.
He’s also been afraid of going to the bathroom, to preschool, and to bed lately and I don’t know what do do other than reassure him that everything’s going to be alright.
And Mimi, while still very sweet, has been getting her molars for the last month or so she’s been a lot needier than usual. And I think she’s also getting ready to go from two naps to one so her sleep schedule is sort of out of whack.
Yesterday I put her down for her usual morning nap and got out the paint to work on touching up the cabinet doors but I had to cut it short because she wouldn’t go to sleep and instead wailed and kept calling out “Mom! Mom! Mom!” which I’ll admit was cute (but frustrating).
Work is still keeping me busy but it’s likely that my contract position is going to go away after June. My department’s budget has been cut so they’re going to have to let me go, but they might get to keep me if something comes through at the last minute. I’ve mostly already made my peace with it since there’s nothing I can do about the situation but the uncertainty of not knowing for sure gets to me sometime. I hate not knowing.
And last night our master bathroom toilet overflowed, enough so that water was leaking from our family room ceiling below. And so today I’ve got to call our home insurance and a plumber and try to get it sorted out.
So….yeah.
Phew! Our DSL line was down from Friday night until earlier today and it seemed like FORever.
Instead of being an responsible adult and using my time offline productively by getting stuff done around the house I moped around and fretted over the work I needed to be doing for my job. Oh, and I played a lot of Draw Something on my cell, burning through my monthly data allowance in the process.
Do you guys play Draw Something? If so (and you want to further enable my procrastinating problem) ping me. My user name is TheNearestFuture.
It’s actually not my kids, it’s me. (Sigh.)
Yesterday I lost the lovely little diamond band N gave me for our 10th anniversary earlier this year. I was using some serious chemical anti-mold stuff to clean under one of our bathroom sinks where the faucet had been leaking so I took off my rings (I wear two stacked on my ring finger) and put them in my pocket so they wouldn’t get gunky.
HOURS LATER I realize in a panic that I’m not wearing my rings and they’re not in my pocket anymore. I find one of them lying on the couch but I can’t find the other one anywhere. I’ve been looking all over the house but half of our house has this thick shag carpet that hides dropped tiny things really well. And I can’t remember if I took them off before or after I made a quick IKEA run. I think it was after, but eep.
N was really sweet about it. I would have been a little bit upset if he had lost something expensive/sentimental that I gave him because of carelessness but he took breaks from cooking dinner to help me look and after I went to bed I heard him looking some more on his own.
I’m going to try and not let this cast a pall over the weekend but I keep worrying about it. Right now I’m going to go give my bedroom the most careful vacuuming it’s ever had and then my sister Jan is taking me out to lunch for my birthday. I’m hoping that it will eventually turn up, but even if it doesn’t things will be okay.
More than okay, even.
So Mimi, while continuing to be totally adorable and easygoing during the day, has been waking up two or three times during the night for about the past 6 weeks.
And it is WRECKING me.
I have some fun posts planned but first I need to clear this fog from my head.
It turns out that the noted 20th-century philosopher Garfield was correct. I’m looking at the front end of this week already feeling exhausted. It think it’s mostly because I’ve had a raging sinus infection for a few days now and add to that several big work deadlines, a teething baby who has sleeping more poorly than she ever has before, and a dentist appointment to get a few cavities filled and blarg, my friends. BLARG.
But yesterday was actually really lovely. At church I taught the lesson in Relief Society and I drew heavily from this talk. (Read it if you have a few seconds; it is really great.) I still get ridiculously nervous when I teach at church but I think I’m slowly getting better at being more coherent. At least I hope so 🙂
After our church meetings we drove to my in-laws’ church service. They were scheduled to speak about their recent mission experience in Korea and it was great to hear their remarks. And then we came home, the stars aligned, and we all took much needed naps. Yay for naps.
Yesterday was totally lame: E was on a tear and being outright defiant and even though he hasn’t had them in several weeks he had two accidents (one incredibly while he was sitting on my lap on our bed). And then I broke my little toe which was the icing on the cake.
It happened in such a embarrassingly stupid way, too. I answered the front door and side of my foot was underneath the edge of the door so when I went to walk away my toe got caught and bent back. I actually heard a “crack!” At first I thought it was just the knuckle popping but a few minutes later the discoloration and swelling (and pain!) started. I called my doctor and they said there wasn’t anything they could do and just to tape it to the toe next to it. So I taped it and dug out my bottle of mega-dose ibuprofen from when I had Mimi.
I know that in the grand scheme of things my problems aren’t bad at all (i.e. “white people problems”) but I can’t help but feel a little beat all the same.
I hope things go better today.
I can’t remember the last time I was this happy to see a holiday weekend end. N has been out of town at a music festival since Friday but is coming home tonight. I originally had all sorts of grand plans for when he was out of town: the main thing I wanted to work on was piecing my rainbow quilt. But I came down with the bug that E’s been fighting for almost two weeks and consequently got nothing done. Instead I moped around the house in a fog and went to bed early every night.
I did get to see a few friends but other than that we just stayed home. With E being cranky and me not feeling well there were more times than I care to admit when my patience wore thin. But happily there were some lovely moments too. Exhibit A:
Anyway, we are all really looking forward to having N home tonight. E cried and cried when we dropped N off at the airport and has asked when his dad is coming home every day. I’ve really missed spending time with N and chatting with him about our days every evening.